So after reading DamaiMikaz san's journal Will You Be My Friend?
I felt the sudden urge to write this, and well yeah.
I understand in past experiences that people have different ideas and ways to have a friend and get accepted as a friend.
Will you be friend? I would say yes but no one asked me that before.
Right now I just moved into college as a freshman and I'm worried everyday.
What if I don't make friends? I'm really socially awkward.
I never got bullied in my life, no, I got ignored most of the time. Since the first day of kindergarten to fourth grade I was ignored by my classmates and sometimes avoided for reasons I'm not sure about, to the point that I sometimes wished someone would bully me. So I was loner till fourth grade, no big deal some of you might think right? Right. I moved somewhere else at fifth grade and I made "friends" simply because I started to shut away my childish high so I would be less annoying. And some kid finally talked to me and I followed her group everywhere, they let me. After a year I returned to the school I was going to before. I wasn't ignored like before but I was awkward and had no idea what to do. I wanna talk to people so badly but I have nothing to say, what do I say?
Well from that point on things got better for me I got real awesome friends, my best friend left me for another group of friends at some point. But after years of getting use to I could be myself and talk, laugh, open up with my friends.
So I graduate, and we all go our separate ways.
And I'm back to square one, no friends, but I can make friends right?
Its a bit early to lose hope since only a bit over a week past and I couldn't make any friends. But I am panicking inside and worried as hell. Everyone seems to already become buddy-buddy with each other, I went to as much social events as I could but I'm always the quite and awkward one at the corner. My high school group of friends are already busy with their new life so getting in contact with them is a lot harder now. I'm guess I'm just a natural loner.
I met a lot of nice people. But being with nice people is not the same as being friends with them, being friends and being friendly is different. I don't care is someone is around me or if someone is a million miles away I can be a friend. If you message me I will be there and answer back as fast as possible. I would love to get to know new people and become friends, as long as you can prove to me that you can be a real friend as well and honesty is crucial too. I wont say no to you as long as you can be the kind of friend who actually cares about me. I agree with becoming friends with the kind of friend DamaiMikaz san's journal had explained. I will listen to your problems, your crappy jokes, teasing, random crap as long as you do the same with me. If you just wanted a short chat that's fine too, but if your gonna talk to me and disappear randomly I will be disappointed and actually get depressed. Then I might flame you depending on my mood. If you're just gonna talk shit to me I will tell you to happily fuck off.
There were some times when I thought "I don't need friends" but really, friends are important.
Yeah, I know, I crave recognition and acknowledgment.
I know that not much people are going to read this journal entry but still its worth a shot.
I have no special traits or talents and am not particularly good at anything,
but will you,anyone, be my friend?
P.S. I will reject friend requests if you're a psychopath, creep or something in that category.
Have a nice day